Dear Luv Doctor
My wife is a normal person, but she has an unusual obsession with celebrities. Specifically, she's sure she'll meet someone famous in Austin. She spends hours on short outings observing celebrities. She always posts somewhere in South Congress. Because I heard that Taylor Kitsch once lived near there. Although no evidence has yet been found that this is true, she still spends most of her weekends and weekdays in hopes of meeting him and other celebrities like Matthew McConaughey and Sandra Bullock. When I asked her what she would do if she met a famous person, she said, “Nothing, I just want to see what the person looks like.” I can't help but think this is a waste of her time – she could have spent the four hours with me instead of drinking coffee waiting to meet Taylor Kitsch – so I I'm not sure: I don't know if I should say something or if I should say something. Did I just become a spoiler and ruin her fun time? – Celebrity Stalker’s Husband
First of all, let me say that what your wife is doing is completely harmless. I mean, she's technically a stalker, but not the bad kind. As a hobby, you can do much worse things. For example, what if she goes to the gym every day and comes home and tells you about her workouts in excruciating detail? About the reps and sets before you want to blow her head out? I have no choice but to listen to many stories. In contrast, your wife's celebrity stalking is probably appealing. She doesn't blame it on the celebrities she's never met, but on all the people-watching she does while waiting for Moby Dick McConaughey. why? Because, unlike celebrities, people are fucking glamorous, and Southern Congress is downright awful to them – probably because they're all trying to get kitsch.
When was the last time you saw a celebrity just running around Austin riding scooters, eating trailer tacos, and banging T-dubs in Whitehorse? That's right.
But it's good that your wife isn't easily disappointed. Because I know Austin's dirty little secret. That is, there are no famous people here. To be clear, I'm not saying that Austin is an egalitarian utopia where everyone is treated as a celebrity, or in some cases nobody, but rather that celebrities who move to Austin All the fuss on the internet about is complete bullshit. . Let's be honest, when was the last time you saw a celebrity just running around Austin riding a scooter, eating trailer tacos, and banging shots of his T-His Dubs in Whitehorse? Is that so? The only time you see celebrities in Austin is in her $10 fundraiser photo gallery. I only found out about it after it happened. Was it in Austin? I mean, the caption said it was held in Austin, but if you could fake a moon landing… right?
For years, people have been spinning epic stories about Austin celebrities, but after a while they all sound like the story of my brother seeing a wild bear outside of Dallas. . Sure, they're funny, but only in a chemtrail/Bigfoot/Lake Nessie kind of way. Has anyone ever actually seen Joe Rogan… like standing in line at Juiceland or going to Comedy Mothership just to see Joe Rogan? , Walton's, which he has also been in business for 15 years. How many times have you been there and met Sandra Bullock? Or is there somewhere else for that matter? Does she regularly go to Sandy's Burgers after a dip at Barton Springs? If not, why did she move here? Besides stalking Bob Schneider?
That makes no sense at all. Don't you come across Meadow regularly? the sopranos or from dean gilmore girlsor Coach Taylor's friday night lights, or at least one of Clint Eastwood's children? I understand why. It's a fake copy. Celebrities. news. I think it's great for real estate brochures, but it gets boring after a while…like hearing a detailed summary of someone's workout routine. Look, I know some people will read this and say, “I'm sure there are celebrities in Austin too. They just hang out in fancy places you can't even get into.” Yes, that's right. I'm sure they're feeding wild bears outside of Dallas. Personally, I'd rather take a chance on wildlife in the South Parliament. If there's actually a celebrity in Austin, it's probably there.
