- Dennis Dabney, 57, super commutes from Texas to Arizona almost every week.
- He said it was the best thing he could have done to further his career.
- But it can be financially taxing and being away from family can be difficult.
For Dennis Dabney, 57, traveling is not unusual.
Dabney began his current job in Virginia in 2016 after serving 26 years in the Air Force. As a military family, his wife and two children were used to moving around, so three years later, the company asked him to relocate to Fort Worth, Texas, which he did.
Then in 2022, Dabney received an offer for a promotion within the company to program director in Phoenix. Dabney was excited about the opportunity and saw it as a great chance to advance in her career and increase her income.
His wife and two teenagers But the children were established in Fort Worth and didn't want to move again, nor did their 88-year-old mother, who lived with family.
So Dabney and his family decided to buy an apartment in Phoenix, live there during the week, and commute to Fort Worth on weekends.
“I couldn't have done this without the support of my family and my wife, and that's been so important in making decisions about where I went and where I worked over the years,” Dabney told Business Insider.
“You have to keep open communication with your family because things change and attitudes change and you have to gauge when things are getting out of hand and when things are going smoothly,” he said.
Dabney takes every other Friday off work, usually booking a 2.5-hour flight home on a low-cost carrier such as Spirit or Frontier on that day. Sometimes, family comes to visit while he's in Phoenix. Though his company helped with moving expenses, he estimates the extra commute costs him about $20,000 a year.
Supercommuting has grown in popularity in recent years, with more Americans taking advantage of hybrid work environments and spending longer commutes to earn extra money. As of 2021, according to U.S. Census Bureau American Community Survey data, 3.1 million Americans This fell into the category of a super commute, meaning a commute that takes more than 90 minutes.
Dabney loves her job and is grateful that she was allowed to pursue this opportunity, even though it may be hard to leave her family, but she recognizes that not everyone can do it.
“This is about learning how to use my mindset, my background, and all of that to create the quality of life that I want,” Dabney said. “And this has been a growth and development stage for me in figuring out what I want and what the art of the possible is.”
“The whole experience was very satisfying.”
This wasn't Dabney's first super commute experience: Prior to his new role in Phoenix, he would drive five hours to Louisiana every week for various roles within the company, and always come home every weekend to see his family and cheer on his children's various sports events.
“It was a total waste to pull my kids out of high school and send them to Louisiana and eventually Phoenix,” Dabney said. “We moved a lot, but once we got to Texas, it was very clear to my family that they didn't want to move again.”
Dabney said he wouldn't have been able to become a super commuter if his children were younger, but doing so at this stage in his life allowed him to become an executive, earn more money to support his family, find a job that gave him a sense of purpose, and feel confident in his decision to work more than 1,000 miles from home.
“The experience overall was very satisfying,” he said. “It was also nice to get the experience of living in a different part of the country that I probably would never have lived in before.”
Of course, there are downsides to a long commute: Airfare and vacation homes can be expensive, Dabney said, and he recommended that anyone considering super-commuting be transparent with their company and negotiate a compensation package that covers some of those costs.
He also said that people who are used to traveling because of their military background but can't travel as frequently should consider whether they can afford to travel several hours by car or plane every week.
As BI previously reported, data from Stanford economists Nick Bloom and Alex Finnan found that commutes of at least 75 miles have increased by 32% since the pandemic's peak, while hybrid work has expanded lifestyle choices.
It's a sign that more people are considering the lifestyle Dabney has adopted. While he said he has no regrets, he warned that anyone who commutes long distances should be fully aware of the consequences.
“From the company's perspective, you're choosing not to move your family to work and you're choosing to make a long commute away from them,” Dabney said. “It took me a while to realize that the company didn't owe you anything more.”
Are you or have you been a super commuter? Are you considering becoming a super commuter? Share your story with this reporter. Ashfee.
